STOP STRUGGLING: It’s a Waste of Your Time and You Know It!
by Andrea Schulman
Listen to the words of some of today’s most popular music. Watch reality television. Go to the movies and analyze the plot lines.
Our collective consciousness is often literally obsessed with struggle.
However, the focus on the struggle is precisely what causes so much struggle in the world today. Because humans often identify as creatures who have to fight to survive, that has become the reality for many, many people.
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Those who believe they have to fight to survive end up fighting over, and over, and over again. They fight against anyone who they perceive as being in their way, including themselves. They have no peace.
If you really think about it, you know that this is true.
For example:Let’s say that for some reason your coworker doesn’t like you. You can just tell that she has it out for you. What do you do?
If you choose to get nasty with her, gossip about her and be passive aggressive towards her, how do you expect she will respond? Will she change her tune? Will she suddenly start being nice? Do you imagine your workplace will become a more positive and loving place?
No. In fact, hell no. This option will guide you directly to the workplace apocalypse, and you know it. You’ll be fighting forever, or you will find that you both bond over your mutual bitchiness, and start to terrorize others together on a grander scale in the office.
In any event, there will not be peace. That you can be assured of.
This is because struggling against a “hostile” situation only enflames the hostile situation and makes it much worse than it started out. This is why frequently small, insignificant misunderstandings blow up and become arguments or even breakups. Through struggling against the situation, we only fuel the negativity of the situation. We only create more of what we do not want.
Letting goSo what do you do when you find yourself in a hostile situation then? Do you just surrender? Do you just let people get away with being jerks?
Why? Because it’s in your best interest to do so, that’s why! The only way you “win” in a hostile situation is when you are able to transcend it.
So let it go! Who cares if your coworker is mean, or if your team lost the playoffs? Who cares if your boss put extra work on your desk or if your kids are being little assholes today? Why take a small inconvenience and turn it into World War III? Why spend an hour, a day, a week or a lifetime fighting against something you could just as easily blow off and move on from?
Stop struggling against that which you don’t want. Struggling only puts all of your energy directly into a situation you do not want to enflame.
Accept what isAccept what is, and do your best to be kind regardless. Just because someone is mean to you doesn’t mean they deserve your hostility. Just because someone cut you off in traffic doesn’t mean they are a bad person. Even if you’ve been wronged in the worst sort of way there just isn’t any justification for you to struggle, because in the end, your struggle only worsens your situation.
Stop struggling. Learn to go with what life throws at you. Take a deep breath, relax, and focus on the present moment. Stay in the moment and make the peace in each moment more important than any perceived threat from the past or the future. This is how you live life without fighting to survive.
All of the fights, misunderstandings and “issues” can be small potatoes in your life when you treat them as such-I promise!
Do you wake up at the same