Inauthenticity and the Empath
by Diane Kathrine
In these current times, many Empaths are struggling with the countless pretenses we face in daily life. We have a strong awareness of the fact we are meant to live with integrity. We know we are not supposed to lie for personal gain or to manipulate others and, although we may strive each day towards bettering our-self and finding our truth, it becomes increasingly harder to do when all around us we see so much dishonesty and corruption.
In a world where silver-tongued fraudsters, who spin twisted webs of deceit, are rewarded for their outspoken dishonesty, and those who speak their truth get attacked or victimized, it is easy to understand why people are hesitant to live authentically. And because it seems many are content to bury their heads and not hear or accept real truths, it can feel like things will never change and only get worse.
We are in a time where dishonesties are breeding more dishonesty and much of the populace are living in a state of cognitive dissonance. This is causing conflict and chaos within the Empath’s psyche, and is another reason some are so out-of-balance. Something will always feel off ‘energetically’ whilst the world is awash with hyped propaganda and disinformation, and can leave the Empath feeling anxious and physically drained.
But it’s not just living under a disingenuous and power-corrupt establishment that creates imbalance within the Empath, simply being in the presence of inauthenticity can be enough to throw us into disarray.
As an Empath, when we spend time with someone who is not vibrating truthfully it affects us on many levels. When in the company of those whose words don’t match their vibrational energy, it can feel as if our brains have been scrambled. So much so, we may struggle to form a complete sentence when spending time with them. This mind-numbing effect is not caused because the other person is in any way evil, but because our Empathic antenna is picking up all is not what it seems. We are detecting that what this person is showing is not a true reflection of who they really are. Quite often this is because they are hiding deep inner pain. When anyone creates a fake persona, it is a way to hide a side from others that they believe will be rejected (or in some cases as a way to manipulate). Every human wants to feel special and loved, but because many feel unworthy or unlovable, they create a fictitious side to their personality and become inauthentic in their quest to be accepted.
When we come across inauthentic people, it is easy to believe we are getting energetically attacked because often that is exactly what it feels like. Our brain gets scrambled because we are reading contradictory energy. It can be seen as stumbling over words or our memory and thought process being unpleasantly affected. It can even cause illness, nervousness or anxiety. This ‘brain scrambling’ could be classed as a form of protection. Our brains are trying to make us aware that something is not right with the present energetic connection. We are not always given direct information about the nature of the contradiction, just a sign that something is off (it is up to us to learn to decipher our reactions). Anyone who is not emanating truthful vibes will put an Empath on high alert, even when we are not in imminent danger.
Now just because we recognize inauthenticity in others, it does not mean we are not guilty of hiding aspects of our personality. We all have to put a face on at some point, even if it’s just acting upbeat and happy when we feel sad or depressed. Faking our moods or creating bogus personas can get us through difficult life situations. And then there are times when the Empath find themselves, unintentionally, morphing when around certain people, to fit in with a particular belief structure. But living inauthentically, on a daily basis, is not a healthy way to live for anyone. Many Empaths are becoming more aware of this fact and recognize that by having to hide facets of our-self it just causes more unhappiness and insecurity.
Another aspect some struggle with is not being able to share freely with others about being an Empath.
I know it can sometimes feel like we are being dishonest and living a lie by not always sharing our traits with others. And as much as we would love to blurt out to the world about who we are, what we feel, see and intuit we know it might not go down too well (especially if we have learnt the hard way, from past experiences). We may get mocked or verbally attacked for our revelations, or we may know we’ve revealed too much by the apprehension or disbelief (if even unspoken) we sense in those with whom we’ve shared.
Some people fear what they do not understand and the last thing we would want is for others to feel uncomfortable about our traits and Sensitivities. We learn to respect people’s boundaries and levels of understanding. But I can see a shift happening in people, their awareness is starting to open up. In time, we may find we can talk freely about our gifts, without having the sense of not being accepted or understood. Yet there will always be some who remain cynical of what they can’t comprehend. As long as we know the truth of who we are we can continue to evolve as an Empath.
Choosing not to reveal our Empath traits, or even psychic gifts, because we know they will not be accepted or understood is one thing, but if we pretend to be something we are not, or hide personality traits because we have a high level of disdain for our-self, then we need to confront what the issues are. It is important for all Empaths to uncover buried pains and insecurities, because whilst living a lie, we will never be happy or feel complete. The problem then lies in that many of us do not know the root-cause of our inner-pain.
One of the biggest causes of unhappiness on this planet is people not knowing themselves and when we hide a side of us, from others, without understanding the reason, it creates deep inner-turmoil that we will carry with us until we face our truth.
Being true and authentic is emotionally freeing. Quite often, many of the personality attributes we bury have been inherited or passed down the family line, and aren’t even our original issues. But wherever they stemmed from, it is important to uncover the truth of these characteristics, and if they can’t be changed (some traits are hard-wired), accept them for what they are. By discovering the real meaning of our insecurities, and accepting them as part of our journey, they often lose their hold and negative effect on us.
I believe these current times are all about finding and living our truth. Lies are being exposed left, right and center because it is time for everyone to find their truth and live authentically (and not just the Empaths).
During this time, whilst the world is in such upheaval, many of us have found that by staying away from people and hiding out in the sanctuaries of our homes, offers us protection and allows us to live in the authenticity we so crave. When we spend time alone, or with our nearest and dearest, we get to be our true authentic selves. Not having to put on a ‘people-pleasing-show’ on a daily basis feels so good that we may dread or begrudge having to go out in the world.
When overwhelmed, tired and emotionally drained it feels right to withdraw and hide in a place where no one can reach us. As Empaths, we want to be grumpy if that is how we feel, or lick our wounds in private when we are in pain, and we need time alone to process everything we pick up energetically. This is why staying out of sight, ‘under our stone’, becomes utterly delicious and addictive. It is here we get to live our truth. And there is no shame in taking shelter when external conditions are bad. I believe that if it feels right to cut off from society at certain times in life, then it is right.
Spending time ‘under our stone,’ is our time for growth. When away from the noise of negativity and distraction, we get to face ourselves and uncover our deepest pain and fears. It is also then we hear the gentle voice of guidance steering us towards the path to heal, repair and evolve as an Empath. That said, we still need the triggers that make us question and recognize the pain we carry inside. And by living in a world where deceit, inauthenticity and overwhelmingly crazy energy runs rife, it is the perfect way for that switch to be triggered…
Without pain, we do not pursue progression.
So, to close, although it may cause great discomfort and frustration, inauthenticity serves the Empath in many ways: it opens our awareness to the truths of ourselves and others, it helps uproot and dislodge stubborn buried grievances and pushes us towards searching for the answers to life.
It may be hard to comprehend, in these trying times, but trust that all we experience as Empaths is pushing us in the direction of something magical. Continue to put in the work and you will see that magic starting to unfold!
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About the Author
Diane at Just Be is an Empath and has spent the past 15 to 20 years ('since waking up') researching and learning ways to make life as an Empath easier. She has discovered many ways for the Empath to stay healthy and in balance and shares her findings on her blog. Articles written by Diane were published on Awakening People with her explicit written permission.